A Goat In Sheep’s Clothing

Today’s first reading…in Paul’s letter to the Romans…he wrote, “I do not do the good I want but do the evil I do not want”.  I see myself like him…“Miserable one that I am”.

I muse about the about the Son of Man coming in his glory and separating one from another as the shepherd separates the sheep from the goats…and I speculate...perhaps I’m a goat in sheep’s clothing.

Dear Lord Jesus,

I do not do the good I want

Listening to the devil’s taunt.

I do not need to take this jaunt

It causes nothing but trouble and haunt.

As I approach my final sleep

I see my life in a heap.

I fret and ponder thoughts so deep

It gives me cause to cry and weep.

O’ my soul so thin and gaunt

 ‘tis your help I truly want

Now I pledge Your Word to keep.

No more a goat…now a sheep.

Amen

A Recovering Recluse

Being a self proclaimed introvert I tend to keep away from other people.  I don’t deal with drama very well…especially their drama.  Adequate social skills have eluded me…engaging in casual conversation is next to impossible.  To chat, to gossip, or to participate in shallow drivel seems like meaningless communication and a colossal waste of time.  Yet…on another level…I realize I’m missing some element of showing that I care about others. 

 It is so much more comfortable to hide in my closet scribbling my thoughts, musings and reflecting while I avoid others and their drama. 

Dear Lord Jesus, 

For this I pray

Give me the gumption today

To come out of my inner room and say,

“Hello” to someone who may 

Need your love in a special way.

I realize it is not right

To hide my candle’s light

Under a bushel basket

That may become my casket.

Amen

What Is God Saying To Me?

“Stop judging and you will not be judged.  Stop condemning and you will not be condemning.  Forgive and you will be forgiven.”
Luke 6: 37

Yes Lord, I know, I must stop my gnat straining, camel swallowing ways/

And picking the splinter from my brother’s eye never pays.

So come Holy Spirit and change my heart/

Because from you, Lord, I cannot be apart.
Amen.

Rubix Cube

It sat on my desk staring at me and taunting my ego...saying “you can do it…your nine year old grandson did it. Go ahead try it.”  

After an eternity of aggravation and frustration I goggled the instructions that explained the algorithmic method to the solution.  This did nothing but confuse the issue.  Now, I am thinking just peel off the little colored stickers and place them where I want them.

It is difficult to put into words the irritation and disappointment I felt.  But at that moment…that Erica moment…it became clear that if I could not understand this...then I would never understand the complexity of God and his thinking.   

I will never be able to totally process God’s logic in my head but some where deep down in my heart…in the depths of my soul…I know he is there, he is real and he loves me.

He is the only thing that makes sense in a world of non-sense…he is the only one who can calm my fears and let me know that everything will be OK.

I’m just a rube

With that Rubix cube

But worry not

he has a plot

For in God’s hands

Are my plans

It’s for the best

My final rest

Amen.

Going Under The Knife

There is something about going under the knife that makes me think of mortality, death and the life hereafter…no matter how small the lump or bump being cut out.

I am always a bit conflicted in my thoughts…torn between the promises of eternal happiness and the thought that I’ve done nothing to deserve any of it. 

But I cling to the hope of an all merciful, all loving God who has always taken care of me…even back when I would not have given Him the time of day…that thought crushes me with gratitude, humility and lets me know everything will be OK. 

Dear Lord Jesus

Thank you for being who you are.

Even when it seems too far

that I will never make the par.

You always are my saving star.

Amen.

Autumn Mornings

I so love this time of year

When air is fresh and shy is clear.

I rise with Venus in the east

And see God’s stars that never cease.

The heavens filled with such amaze

Not obstructed by the haze.

Little star…up there so high

I see the twinkle in God’s eye.

As mornings twilight glow appears

I hear the songbirds in my ears.

And so it goes all the day

With sun a shining I make hay.

With daylight over I fall asleep

I count my blessings instead of sheep.

I can’t believe I am so blessed

Yes…dear Lord, you are the best.

Amen.

My Prayer For Today

Dear Lord Jesus

I sat down to compose a prayer

But my thoughts evaporated in air

I couldn’t express the indescribable feeling

That comes with your miraculous healing.

But this I must get off my chest

That I am thankful you have blessed

You’ve saved my life from utter disaster

Forever, you will be my master.

Words are cheep and fade away

But With your help…I do pray

That my actions will pass the test

And in your arms I come to rest.

Amen.