Do I Haf Ta?

It seams I have a difficult time making decisions or commitments. I was asked if I would like to go back to Guatemala with the medical team again. Torn between looking like the self-centered selfish fool that I am and the knight in shinning armor I want others to think I am…I wrestled with the dilemma. I did not really want to go. I would rather lie on the couch poisoning my body with junk food and my soul with the junk on TV.

Perhaps it was my upbringing that contributed to my inability to make good decisions. My parents always made me do what was best. They made me eat my vegetables, go to church, do my homework and keep my room clean. Now my wife does the same. I never developed a knack for making good decisions because I have never had to. Someone else has always told me what to do and I like it that way. I tend to gravitate toward the lazy side when left on my own.

So I struggled with the question “would you LIKE to go?” I tried every excuse. It’s my busy schedule, I can’t afford the expense, I might get sick, and I can’t speak the language. I could not come up with one valid excuse. At least not one that would hold up in count come “judgment day”.

I’d better go out to the garage and find that duffle bag, dust off my passport and pray that this decision will please the one to whom I owe all my many blessings to.

Amen.


8/9/2008